Nightmare

It’s an early Saturday morning and the sun isn’t properly visible yet. I was suddenly awakened by a force that has come from somewhere inside me. I could hardly realize what it was as I was immersed in an extra-ordinary dream. The usually unusual dream of me loosing my gravity and floating in the air. It is usual because I keep getting these kind of dreams very often and unusual because I really find it weird. I was slowly opening my eyes but couldn’t as that force which woke me up was actually transforming into some kind of an illogical pain. I finally grabbed some courage and opened my eyes and found a woman sleeping beside me.

Now before you draw conclusions, let me tell you, that I was traveling on an official assignment with a group of girls who were unfortunately my colleagues and I was the only guy accompanying them from my office in the trip and we were actually traveling in a bus. Now when I say there are a group of girls and there is also the word unfortunate, you could easily conclude few things, and yeah to make it easy for you, let me tell you that I met them for the first time. Anyway, back to the situation, as I didn’t feel like looking at her, I turned to the other side and was looking at the window. I was trying to analyze of how I should react as the pain was growing slowly as each minute was passing by. I knew it would have to come and was helpless. It feels like you’re hit by a 9mm pistol and the bullet once gets into your body is slowly passing though every minute. Occasionally there are also tough ones which make the pain more complicated.

Now few of you who might have experienced or guessed it, I don’t have to explain anything and for those who are still confused and thinking of what all this could be, I’m talking of my situation in a bus where I have a girl and especially my colleague beside me and the force is ‘my Pee’. I was very shy and didn’t actually want to go and ask the driver to stop for my Pee. One of the main reasons is that these bus drivers, who I think rarely drink any water as they never Pee, reject or ignore our request to stop the bus for Peeing. Probably that is something very immaterial for the guy or probably he wears those huggies kind of Nappies, I didn’t actually think of the reasons though, but these guys are very bad as they don’t really understand the priority or the urgency of reaction that the situation needs. I didn’t want to be embarrassed by the driver and so I didn’t go to him and was trying to control and the situation was getting worse.

I suddenly realized that since I woke up the bus just moved a mere 50kms and it’s been more than an hour that it got worse. I finally gained some courage and have moved that sleeping log beside me and went to the driver only to be ignored and he waved me away saying he’d stop after sometime. And that ‘after sometime’ was very long and it was actually longer because of the situation. Finally he stopped after another 50kms drive while I was thinking of writing this blog and many other funny things just to make the situation feel a bit worse from worst. As soon as he stopped, the bastard began to look behind for me and was waving at me, making me even more embarrassed but for the situation which I didn’t really care. Once I was out, the relief of the release I felt is truly wonderful and was thanking for the Happy Ending!

Relations

I always wonder why relations are so weird. There was a time when I used to feel that I’ve been good at maintaining them and have felt proud for the art. But now, since the time I started working, I feel I’m so lonely and disabled with most of my relations screwed up. Even though I know the reasons, I’m not able to change myself back. I don’t know if I’ve become very impatient or if people around me have become stupid. I feel a lot irritated by the things they do and the way they handle things with me. I don’t like it anymore. Has everything around me become so very monotonous that I’ve started to feel bored of them or those things? I keep trying to justify everything and everyone around me for retrospection. Even though I do find my mistakes, I feel that others are lot more responsible for my behavior. Now because of this I try to analyze things much more and try to look at them with an unbiased opinion, still I find I’m a bit less at the wrong side. I don’t know if this all started because of me or them. Or may be they were the same and I was able to adjust previously and which I’m not able to do now because of my impatience and temper.

Relations are like a number of threads joined together and the two ends being held strongly by the two people sharing them. Now initially when the tug starts the threads are united and thus are very strong. Later, as time goes and the tug continues and the threads are being pulled more often, the threads in all become weak and at a certain level there comes a stress point and then the disaster starts. Now as the illness of the relation grows, you could easily observe that the threads start to break one by one. At this point of time, if the threads are not properly replaced ‘each at a time’, they tend to go worse and the bond might break at any time.

It’s actually time for me to do something and act upon and it’s just that I’m trying to find ways to do that. Anyway, for all you guys reading this post, I feel it is really important that you guys not only cling on to your threads tightly but also see that the other person too has a tight grip over them and never pull them tight, else you know what might happen!! Retrospection is something really great and helps you realize a lot of things, the more you learn to do that, the more it helps you if only you do it with an unbiased mind. Let me warn you that when you’re doing this so called retrospection, the sickest thing is that even though you thing you are unbiased, deep inside, there’s a devil which always takes your side, so be very careful about him and the rest would do just fine.